Brainless afternoon

When you are approaching the end of the workday and your brain has long since turned to mush, there is only one thing you need. You need a good old youtube video.

Or two.

 

The things we do for beauty

Know what would be awesome? Of course you do. But in case you don’t know what I’m getting at, here is what would be awesome: a way to get tons of protein in an easy and cheap way. Like, what if you could just say a word, and 50 grams of protein would just be in your body. That would be a dream come true… but what would the word be? ‘Barracuda?’ ‘Highlighter?’ Or maybe it would be a new word, like ‘Gorbalglax,’ (except that is not actually a new word… that’s the name I gave an animal I made up in 6th grade. It had a turtle shell, wings, and a dolphin tale).

Sadly, we live in a world where saying ‘Gorbalglax’ will not get you protein. In reality, we must buy expensive meats and protein powders. Except for one thing. Here in Jakarta there is a drink called “mung bean drink,” or as Brady and I like to call it, “mung.”

Now there are a few things you must know about mung. First, it is really cheap. One carton (8 oz) costs only 30 cents. Second, it has lots of protein per oz and for the price. The carton has 12 grams of protein, which compared to most other things over here, is a lot.

The third thing you should know, is that when it has been kept nice and cold in the refrigerator, it is just barely drinkable. When it is room temperature, it is awful. The carton I’m currently drinking is approaching room temp, and it is a struggle to get it down. But I must. I will not let my body waste away.

Sometimes to help myself drink it, I think of myself with about 5 more pounds of muscle. And sometimes I just remind myself that beauty is pain. And sometimes I just plug my nose and then quickly eat something afterward. And still other times, I think of Gorbalglax, flying free through the sky, swimming in clear waters, protected from predators…

***

In other news, Alfonso is pregnant again. Before I was made aware of the creatures growing inside his [her] stomach, I noticed something was up when he stopped last week and stared me down. After months of moping around mourning the loss of his last litter, this stare-down took me off guard. In case you forgot who Alfonso is, click here.

It’s safe to say I am not thrilled about this new development. I can only hope that the toads that hop around at night scaring innocent passers-by [me] will decide to attack him and all will die.

That was morbid. But true.

Here is a pic of me drinking my mung. It is dangerously warm right now.